Thursday, January 07, 2016

The Awful Truth

This morning I learned something about's not the hot tea that I adore; it's the sugar I dump in it. It's not the bubbles of soda that I crave; it's the sugar.  *face palm*  I am a sugar addict. This is no surprise to me or anyone that knows me. The problem is the withdrawals I experience and inflict on others when I attempt to break free. Now, before you message me about how to give up sugar without withdrawals, don't, please don't. In 1988, I went sugar free for a year and a half and it was glorious! I felt better than I had in.....well, ever....and my health was illness free during that time. Why did I go back to my sweet but evil ways? A hospital staff that insisted I eat ALL the food brought to me during my week long stay (I had just given birth and hemorraged due to DIC syndrome and developed Strep B). I protested at first, but in my weakness, I caved in to that hospital chocolate pudding which was sooooo much better than the limp meat that was on the same tray. I have tried numerous times to free myself from my addiction, but the withdrawal gets me every time. Do I want to never eat sugar again? Of course not. I just want to loosen the death grip it has on me, largely because my health needs to improve. I am 70+ lbs overweight, I have peripheral artery disease, I have bone spurs in my knees and feet, I have arthritis, I have fibromyalgia, I have asthma, and acid reflux that is out of control. I know what to do and how to do it, but pulling the trigger is hard. So, in baby step fashion, I am going to not drink tea that has sugar or any sweeteners of any kind in it. I will also not drink soda. Aaaccckkk! This will cut down on my caffeine consumption. During this time, I am not responsible, but do apologize for, any and all snarkiness. 

Tuesday, January 05, 2016

Baby Stepping

I realize that I did not post much in 2015.  Honestly, 2015 was the darkest year of my entire life and I felt as though I had nothing to offer anyone in the way of blogs.  It was a difficult year, but it was also a time that saw me cling hard and fast to God and I survived. Last year is gone and this year is looking much, much brighter. Currently, I am trying to regain my house, my health, and my life.  I am reorganizing and cleaning out every square inch of our home, trying desperately to going back to taking good care of my body (not succeeding too well yet), and looking to become much more involved in Church.  It has nothing to do with New Years Resolutions or the date on the calendar, but rather there has been resolution in my life and this is when I have time and space to breathe and grow again.  I do hope to post again, but for now, I'm baby stepping my life back on track. I look forward to living, growing, and sharing!